Today was a sprinkler park kind of day. Surprisingly, it's quite warm here in sunny Florida. Warm may be a bit of an understatement, like saying Joan Rivers has had some minor cosmetic procedures. She looks as if her face was in the dryer a bit too long. Joan, if we can see the immovable joint/seams in your skull, the skin has been pulled too tight. You don't look young, you look like a cheap halloween decoration. I would be scared if she popped up on a front lawn in my neighborhood.
My friends and I decided that the local sprinkler park needed a visit from our combined passal of children. You would think, living near the ocean, that we would spend all our time there, but, truthfully, the surf can be rough, and it's rather large, so it makes keeping an eye on your kids tough. We go as a family, but then the ratio of adults to kiddos is 3:2 which makes safety much more realistic. Plus, and I wouldn't have known this before becoming a Floridian, the surf is so intense that you really can't swim, you just sort of bob around and get slammed to the sand by the huge waves. It is a beautiful sight, the sheer immensity, the power, but it ain't a kiddie pool. So, like I said, we figured our kids would get wet enough at the Sprinkler Park.
The day began with a thorough sp-effing. I slathered my little crackers with spf 70. Did you know that they can't call sunscreen waterproof anymore? They label it "highly water resistent." For some reason, I find this humorous. Anyway, I made sure they were completely covered in high quality sun protection. I don't want my babies to endure the burning, blistering and peeling that characterized my own childhood. Sun protection wasn't all that great in the 70's. I am told that I once posessed the ability to tan...kryptonite, who knew? It took quite a while to get ready, to amass the snacks and towels and pack the giant cooler...all the important stuff. I met up with my friends and their kids at the park, we looked for a picnic table that wasn't reserved, and off-loaded our hoard. (summer fun requires massive levels of accoutrement)
We partied in the water, which smelled of chlorine and Deltona Municipal Water Supply-funk, but that did nothing to "rain on our parade." A fun time was had by all...at least, until the thunderstorm found us. The kids argued that they were already wet, so playing in an electrical storm wouldn't be a stretch. I assured them that although I find their company quite stimulating, the addition of lightning would be downright electrifying...and, frankly, I don't want a bunch of tiny Frankensteins joining Joan Rivers to decorate my lawn!